Have you experienced a shuddering case of couldas, wouldas, shouldas in your life lately?
Or have you endured a frightful time of head shaking and mournfully wondering why, oh why did I do that? Or more depressing, why, oh why didn’t I do that?
For eons myriads of books have been printed, masterpieces painted, music composed and scored, all dealing with the relationships among humankind in the could-have, should-have and would-have dialog of everyday life.
When I was eighteen years old, I knew it all. Couldas, shouldas, and wouldas are an anathema to most teenagers. Never again in my long life have I known such certitude. It did not take much living to show me with absolute certainty that I really knew very little about anything and a whole lot of nothing about everything else.
Black and white used to be the norm. Now in my dotage great patches of grey regularly appear, often morphing into a quite lovely, most suitable, shade of lavender.
Incidents rarely or seldom are what they seem. Arguments have two sides. Misunderstandings have blame to share.
Plenty of mental space for permanent couldas, shouldas, and wouldas.
But how do we turn that thinking into positive action? How do we reconcile doing with not doing? Or might we not even need to do so?
Like death, wrinkles and taxes, eventually we succumb to the inevitable truism of our fallibility – it simply is the way life re-creates us.
This is the startling surprise. We are less than perfect…not even remotely, or in any smidgeon of life, do we approach the perfect.
My. Oh my. Oh.